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12 June 2009 @ 11:34 pm
another letter, another lie  
When you apologized to me yesterday, it was so out of the blue that it threw me for a loop. Not because I'd been sitting around, waiting with bated breath for a sincere apology that would never come, but because I'd moved on from where we were three months ago and gave little to no thought of you in my daily comings and goings.

It's almost laughable that you'd choose now to do it. I don't need you in my life and I don't particularly trust you, as I told you yesterday. You lied and cheated and stole in ways that you probably can't even comprehend. When I thought I could trust you, you stabbed me in the back, preferring to base opinions and decisions on things your mind conjured, rather than face the truth. We could go back and pour over how there were three involved or whatever, but quite frankly, I don't have the time for that.

You're not sorry about what you did to me. I don't believe that you're honestly genuine about being wrong. I mean, you apologized and then turned around and said, "Oh, but I'm not the only one to blame." Here's a hint when apologizing: don't blame the other parties involved, regardless of whether or not they were in the wrong too. You can't be the bigger man when you're condemning those around you with the same hand you offer apologies with.

I think the only reason you even decided to come forward is because your relationship with her is in jeopardy. What kind of relationship you think that is, I don't know, but I think you're mistakenly convinced that if you play nice with me, it'll get you in her good graces. Here's a news flash: she doesn't give a damn about what you think about me. Not any more. Whatever issues you guys are having have to do with you and how she feels about you. I'm not involved in this. Not this time.

When and if you ever honestly mean an apology towards me, and it's not an effort to better yourself, then maybe we can talk and try to be friends. But I'm pretty sure that I'm not the one who's crazy and needs help before I end up bringing other people down. At least I know I have a problem and am trying to fix it.
 
 
self-esteem.: stressedstressed
 
 
 
Living in the Sky with Diamondsmikikoshikawa on June 13th, 2009 04:00 pm (UTC)
when apologizing "but" shouldn't even be in the sentence.